diff --git a/chess.md b/chess.md index 9a72b3e..28a2d0c 100644 --- a/chess.md +++ b/chess.md @@ -201,21 +201,27 @@ Some general tips and rules of thumb, mostly for beginners: ## How To Disrespect Your Opponent And Other Lulz In Chess -TODO +*see also [unsportmanship](unsportmanship.md)* -If you do this in a world championship match I will suck your dick. +WORK IN PROGRESS, pls send me more tips :) - OTB (over the board) only: - Turn your knights to face backwards or in another weird way (always face the opponent's king etc.). Also place the pieces unevenly on the squares to piss off opponents with OCD and autism. - - Behave weird, make weird faces, go away extremely far away from the board and walk in circles, constantly sneeze (try to sneeze every time the opponent touches a piece), make very long unbroken eye contact with the opponent while smiling as if you know what he's thinking, call the referee constantly, pretend to fall asleep etc. Overeat on beans before the game so you fart a lot and always try to fart as loud as possible. Wear nice clothes but right before the game go sweat to the gym so that you smell like a pig and distract the opponent with toxic fume. If you're a [wimmin](woman.md) behave sexually, keep grabbing your boobs, lick your lips and silently moan sometimes as if you're having an orgasm; if your opponent is male he is almost definitely smarter than you, you gotta use your woman weapons, but it will probably work easily on the chess virgins. + - Behave weird, make weird faces, walk extremely far away from the board and walk in circles (or just get up and stand up directly behind your opponent in a completely upright position staring into the distance without moving at all like a robot lol), constantly sneeze (try to sneeze every time the opponent touches a piece), make very long unbroken eye contact with the opponent while smiling as if you know what he's thinking, call the referee constantly, go to the toilet after every move, pretend to fall asleep from boredom etc. Overeat on beans before the game so you fart a lot and always try to fart as loud as possible. Wear nice clothes but right before the game go sweat to the gym so that you smell like a pig and distract the opponent with toxic fume. If you're a [wimmin](woman.md) behave sexually, keep grabbing your boobs, lick your lips and opponent's captured pieces and silently moan sometimes as if you're having an orgasm, pretend to masturbate under the table; if your opponent is male he is almost definitely smarter than you, you gotta use your woman weapons, but it will probably work easily on the chess virgins. - In a tournament change play based on opponent's race or sex, for example play only one opening against white people and another opening against black people, see if anyone notices the pattern :D + - Outside tournament take advantage of the fact that you can do whatever the fuck you want: have one hand constantly on the clock and play with the other hand (considered rude and often forbidden), touch and knock over your opponent's pieces, take back your moves, ... and of course when you're losing, "accidentally" knock over the whole board and be like "oops, let's consider it a draw then" :D + - Trash talk the referee. + - ... - online only: - - Be annoying and offensive in chat, if opponent blunders write `gg`, spam `ez` when you win. + - Be annoying and offensive in chat, if opponent blunders write `gg`, spam `ez` when you win. If he wins say it was a shit game and accuse him of [cheating](cheating.md). - Constantly ask for takebacks, offer draws, report legit opponents for cheating and offensive behavior. + - ... - Play the bongcloud, fool's mate, 1. h3 or similar offensive opening, especially against a stronger player. Offer a draw after 1st move. Just play knight F3 and back constantly. Castle manually even if you don't have to. Play the exact mirror of opponent's moves -- if he tries to break it then just always try to get back to mirrored position. -- When losing constantly offer draws, before the last move leave the game and let the clock run out. +- When losing constantly offer draws, prolong the game AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE, before the very last move just let the clock run out. - Repeatedly try to make swastikas on the board, especially against colored opponents. - Underpromote pawns e.g. to knights or bishops. +- When playing a noob, don't just mate him but absolutely rape him, promote all pawns to knights before winning, then say you didn't even have to try and that he should look into another game as chess is clearly not his game. +- Look up chess etiquette and do the exact opposite of what it says. - ... ## LRS Chess diff --git a/comun.md b/comun.md index ea7aee9..51218d5 100644 --- a/comun.md +++ b/comun.md @@ -1,7 +1,37 @@ # Comun -Comun is a [LRS](lrs.md) [programming language](programming_language.md) made by [drummyfish](drummyfish.md) based on his ideals of [good technology](lrs.md). It is still work in progress, currently there is a [suckless](suckless.md) [C](c.md) implementation and a number of supplemental material (specification, tutorial, ...); the project repository is currently at https://codeberg.org/drummyfish/comun. The goal now is to make a [self hosted](self_hosting.md) implementation, i.e. write comun in comun. +Comun is a [beautiful](beauty.md), greatly [minimalist](minimalism.md) [programming language](programming_language.md) made by [drummyfish](drummyfish.md), based on his ideals of good, [selfless](selflessness.md) [technology](technology.md) known as *[less retarded software](lrs.md)* (LRS), of which it is now considered the official programming language. In the future it should gradually replace [C](c.md) as the preferred LRS language. The language has been inspired mainly by [Forth](forth.md), but also [C](c.md), [brainfuck](brainfuck.md) and other ones. Though already usable, it is still in quite early stages of development and work in progress; currently there is a [suckless](suckless.md) implementation of comun in [C](c.md) and a number of supplemental materials such as a specification, tutorial and some example programs. The project repository is currently at https://codeberg.org/drummyfish/comun. The aim now is to make a [self hosted](self_hosting.md) implementation, i.e. write comun in comun. Though very young, **comun is probably already the best programming language ever conceived**. -The language is [minimalist](minimalism.md), [imperative](imperative.md), [stack](stack.md)-based and [low level](low_level.md), similar e.g. to [FORTH](forth.md). +The language is intended to be the foundation of a completely new, non-[capitalist](capitalism.md) computer technology built from the ground up, which should culminate in the creation of the LRS much desired [public domain computer](public_domain_computer.md). This technology is derived from the model of an [ideal society](less_retarded_society.md) and as such will aim for completely different goals (such as helping all living beings as much as possible without enslaving them) and values; this makes comun astronomically different in philosophy and design of the shitty, toxic capitalist joke languages such as [C++](cpp.md) and [Rust](rust.md) which pursue fascism, enslavement of humans to the [productivity cult](productivity_cult.md) etc. -TODO: more, code examples, ... \ No newline at end of file +**A quick sum up** is following: comun is **[minimalist](minimalism.md)**, **[low level](low_level.md)** with minimum [abstraction](abstraction.md), **[portable](portability.md)**, **[imperative](imperative.md)** and **[stack](stack.md)-based**, using **reverse Polish notation**. It can be **both [compiled](compiler.md) and [interpreted](interpreter.md)**. There are **only primitive integer [data types](data_type.md)** (native integer size by default with possibility to specify exact width where necessary, signed/unsigned interpretation is left to the programmer) and **optional [pointers](pointer.md)** that can be used as variables, for managing multiple stacks, creating [arrays](array.md) etc. Its **specification can fit on a sheet of paper** and is **completely [public domain](public_domain.md)** under [CC0](cc0.md) (as is its current implementation). It has **no [standard library](stdlib.md)**. There are **no [English](english.md) keywords**; commands are rather very short (mostly 1 to three symbols) math-like symbols. Source code only allows [ASCII](ascii.md) symbols (no [unicode](unicode.md)). There is an **optional [preprocessor](preprocessor.md) that uses comun itself** (i.e. it doesn't use any extra language). **[Functions](function.md) and [recursion](recursion.md)** are supported. Many features of the language are optional and never burden the programmer if he doesn't use them. Simplified versions of the language (minicomun and microcomun) are also specified. + +Here is a very short showcase of comun code: + +``` +max: <' ? >< . ^ . # takes maximum of two values + +max3: max max . # takes maximum of three values + +# recursive factorial +factR: + ?' + $0 -- factR * + ; + ^ 1 + . +. + +# iterative factorial +factI: + $0 -- + + @' + >< $1 * >< + -- + . + ^ +. +``` + +TODO: more, code examples, compare the above with C, ... \ No newline at end of file