Update

jokes.md

@@ -11,6 +11,7 @@ Also remember the worst thing you can do to a joke is put a [disclaimer](disclai
 { I would like to thank my friend Ramon who contributed to me many ideas for jokes here :D I usually modified them slightly. ~drummyfish }
 
 - [C++](cpp.md)
+- Why doesn't [C++](cpp.md) have [garbage collection](garbage_collection.md)? Because then it would have to collect itself.
 - Why is the maximum speed called terminal velocity? Because [GUI](gui.md)s are slow.
 - What's the worst kind of [lag](lag.md)? Gulag.
 - Ingame chat: "What's the country in the middle of north Africa?" [{BANNED}](niger.md)
@@ -53,9 +54,11 @@ Also remember the worst thing you can do to a joke is put a [disclaimer](disclai
 - One of the great milestones yet left to be achieved by science is to find intelligent life in our Solar System.
 - An evil capitalist, good capitalist and [female](woman.md) genius walk in the park. A bee stings one of them. Who did it sting? The evil capitalists, the other two don't exist.
 - Cool statistics: 9 out of 10 people enjoy a gang [rape](rape.md).
+- What does a shitty programmer say when his program crashes? [OOP](oop.md)s. { Thanks my secret friend. :D ~drummyfish }
 - Basement hackers never die, they just smell that way. Musicians never die, they just decompose (and musicians working part time are [semiconductors](semiconductor.md)).
 - `int randomInt(void) { int x; return x; }`
 - Boss: "We're going to need to store additional information about gender of all 1600 people in our database." Me: "OK that's only 200 extra bytes.". Diversity department: "You're fired."
+- [Java](java.md) is like Alzheimers -- starts slow and eventually takes away all your memory.
 - the [downto](downto.md) operator
 - My girlfriend just left me, she said it's because she thought I was a [pedophile](pedophilia.md). Those are some strong words for an eleven year old.
 - [Schizophrenia](schizo.md) beats being alone.