New poem: None Nuns

poetry/index.gmi

@@ -99,6 +99,7 @@
 => n/neniam-mian.txt	neniam mian
 => n/nil.txt	Nil
 => n/nomadic.txt	nomadic
+=> n/none-nuns.txt	None Nuns
 => n/nosteponsnek.txt	no step on snek
 => n/novatore.txt	novatore sang in the sun
 => n/state.txt	No Sustained State Has Ever Existed (All Empires Fall Eventually)

poetry/index.gph

@@ -100,6 +100,7 @@ iN
 0neniam mian	n/neniam-mian.txt
 0Nil	n/nil.txt
 0nomadic	n/nomadic.txt
+0None Nuns	n/none-nuns.txt
 0no step on snek	n/nosteponsnek.txt
 0novatore sang in the sun	n/novatore.txt
 0No Sustained State Has Ever Existed (All Empires Fall Eventually)	n/state.txt

poetry/index.html

@@ -117,6 +117,7 @@
 	│   ├── <a href="./n/neniam-mian.txt">neniam-mian.txt</a><br>
 	│   ├── <a href="./n/nil.txt">nil.txt</a><br>
 	│   ├── <a href="./n/nomadic.txt">nomadic.txt</a><br>
+	│   ├── <a href="./n/none-nuns.txt">none-nuns.txt</a><br>
 	│   ├── <a href="./n/nosteponsnek.txt">nosteponsnek.txt</a><br>
 	│   ├── <a href="./n/not-found.txt">not-found.txt</a><br>
 	│   ├── <a href="./n/novatore.txt">novatore.txt</a><br>
@@ -186,7 +187,7 @@
 	&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; └── <a href="./y/YOU-NEED-TO-KNOW.txt">YOU-NEED-TO-KNOW.txt</a><br>
 <br><br><p>
 
-23 directories, 135 files
+23 directories, 136 files
 
 </p>
 	<hr>

poetry/n/none-nuns.txt

@@ -0,0 +1,78 @@
+None Nuns
+2022-06-14
+
+***
+
+Shadows in sheep's clothes,
+lead us to the gallows,
+to the place before my garden
+where lies a freshly-dug hole.
+
+For although my soul quite often haunts
+the school where I last belonging sought,
+my childhood memory is blank,
+tabula rasa, greasy smeared blot.
+Something happened I cannot recall,
+cannot excise from tangled Yewiffe,
+inside the church where under bright lamps
+I sweated in so-called sanctuary.
+
+All I comprehend, all that I know
+is that there's a ragged hole
+deep inside my weary soul
+that begs for a sword,
+a spear, a lance, some other blade
+coated in holy fire that shall never fade
+to put me to death in the name of a lord
+I would never in my will bow my head to.
+A voice with a body I swore off in my youth
+deems it romantic, fated, that I subsume
+my will to his and accept my place
+in a pearly and golden-gilded tomb.
+
+Mother,
+will you forgive me after I'm gone?
+Will you take these slivers
+and remnants of songs
+up to the hillside
+where derailed my life
+and let me one more time those trees haunt?
+
+Oh, who am I kidding?
+You never gave a damn about anything I ever wrote
+unless as proof that against *someone* I was sinning
+and needed to be punished for crossing a line
+my brothers could cross as they pleased.
+
+That's all I ever was in your eyes, anyway:
+just a pretty doll to dress up and display
+as proof that you could keep something alive.
+I became old enough to think for myself
+and in favor
+of my brothers
+you pushed me aside
+but demanded I alone keep up the regimens:
+face sliced, breasts bound, jaw forcibly bent.
+
+And if you could, you'd drive nails through my hands
+so never again could I write of the pain,
+silenced, perfect sacrificial lamb
+in the image of a Son
+who deemed all "Other" and "Man".
+
+I could never in a god who hates me so believe.
+I could never impale myself on the altar of femininity,
+so your hands itch to instead order cut down my favorite tree
+to build this gallows. In the wind I could be swinging,
+that child again, joyful, carefree.
+The wind carries the crow forth and my last words echoing:
+
+Do you love me now, Mother,
+now that I'm your martyr?
+That you've forever silenced my voice
+that wanted to ring so loud?
+Do you love me now?
+
+***
+
+CC BY-NC-SA 4.0 (c) Vane Vander