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poetry/n/novatore.txt

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+novatore sang in the sun
+2019-05-12
+
+***
+
+I am a strange and cursed poet
+delirious, destined, comprised
+of a million litle shards of light
+
+laying stabbed here,
+alone, abandoned, punishment for pursuit
+of a weird and perverse rite
+
+over-reliant on nuggets from days gone by
+what happened to the age where I used to so easelessly fly?
+
+tell me, my angel, the love of my life
+what do you make of this thing we call time?
+
+for an enigmatic sort of maelstrom has overtaken my heart
+and now I yearn for a world that does not exist,
+that I *know* does not exist, has never, will never
+in all of the atoms of my body
+and yet they call out to you
+burn in the depths of the night
+two ragged scars on the back of my chest sobbing
+for the fields in which we used to play the days away.
+
+I want to tell you a story
+of a girl named Lucine
+and the many exploits of hers
+which I've oft dreamed
+
+but the encore came out of left field
+for now I sit here among the tomatoes in my garden
+and revel in a world
+where such beautiful things can exist
+underneath my fingertips, lithe as my skin-
+despite the odds, are you and I kin?
+
+her arms would feel lithe,
+this goddess of mine,
+but I have the feeling
+I am proudly less than divine
+
+the final day approaches swiftly.
+I am nineteen now,
+and I must be brave.
+the time for hiding, cowering behind someone else is over;
+there can be no other way.
+
+damn it all! damn it all to the end!
+why do I persist in this place, for some semblance of "friend"?
+an expectation of returns on my dues?
+all you pitiful monsters want me to become a recluse!
+
+all these months I've wasted, collecting your facts
+while on everything I've ever loved, so relentlessly shat
+do you think me a pawn of some scripted fate?
+I can get around without references, even if it means I'll be late!
+
+stop looking,
+stop hiding,
+stop pretending you care.
+a perverse need to know,
+an addiction to hear-say.
+truthiness? *where?*
+
+if the world shall stand against me,
+and my right to exist as I am,
+then I shall stand against it in equal measure.
+
+***
+
+CC BY-NC-SA 4.0 (c) Vane Vander