@ -23,16 +23,19 @@ Also remember the worst thing you can do to a joke is put a [disclaimer](disclai
- Do you use [Emacs](emacs.md)? No, I already have a [waifu](waifu.md).
- `alias bitch=sudo`
- What's a trilobyte? 8 trilobits.
- "Never test for a bug that you don't know how to fix." --manager; "If we cannot fix it, it isn't broken." --also manager
- a joke for minimalists:
- When is [Micro$oft](microsoft.md) finally gonna make a product that doesn't suck???! Probably when they start manufacturing vacuum cleaners.
- Political activists walk into a bar. [Pseudoleftist](pseudoleft) tells his friends: "hey guys, how about we have oppressive rulers and call them a [government](government.md)?" Capitalist says: "well no, let's have oppressive rulers and call them [corporations](corporation.md)". [Liberal](liberal.md) replies: "Why not both?". Monarchist goes: "no, it's all wrong, let's have oppressive rulers and call them Kings." To this pseudo communist says: "that's just shit, let's have oppressive rulers and call them the [proletariat](proletariat.md)". Then [anarcho pacifist](anpac.md) turns to them and says: "Hmmm, how about we don't have any oppressive rulers?". They lynch him.
- There are a lot of jokes at https://jcdverha.home.xs4all.nl/scijokes/.
- There are a lot of jokes at https://jcdverha.home.xs4all.nl/scijokes/. Also http://textfiles.com/humor/JOKES/.
- Hello, is this anonymous [pedophile](pedophilia.md) help hotline? Yes. My 8yo daughter begs for sex, can we do penetration right away or should we start with anal?
- What do you call a [woman](woman.md) that made a computer explode just by typing on it? Normal.
- Does the invisible hand exist in the [free market](free_market.md)? Maybe, but if so then all it's doing is masturbating (or giving us a middle finger).
- 90% of statistics are fake.
- When will they remove the *[touch](touch.md)* and *[kill](kill.md)* commands from [Unix](unix.md)? Probably when they rename *[man pages](man_page.md)* to *person pages*.
- If [law](law.md) was viewed as a programming code, it would be historically the worst case of [bloated](bloat.md) [spaghetti code](spaghetti_code.md) littered with [magic constants](magic_constant.md), undefined symbols and dead code, which is additionally deployed silently and without any [testing](testing.md). Yet it's the most important algorithm of our society.
- C++ is to C as brain cancer is to brain
- C++ is to C as brain cancer is to brain.
- [Entropy](entropy.md) is no longer what it used to be. Nostalgia too.
- At the beginning there was [machine code](machine_code.md). Then they added [assembly](assembly.md) on top of it to make it more comfortable. To make programs portable they created an [operating system](os.md) and a layer of [syscalls](syscall.md). Except it didn't work because other people made other operating systems with different syscalls. So to try to make it portable again they created a high-level language [compiler](compiler.md) on top of it. To make it yet more comfortable they created yet a higher level language and made a [transpiler](transpiler.md) to the lower level language. To make building more platform independent and comfortable they created [makefiles](makefile.md) on top of it. However, more jobs were needed so they created [CMake](cmake.md) on top of makefiles, just in case. It seems like CMake nowadays seems too low level so a new layer will be needed above all the meta-meta-meta build systems. I wonder how high of a tower we can make, maybe they're just trying to get a Guinness world record for the greatest bullshit sandwich in history.
- How to install a package on [Debian](debian.md)? I don't know, but on my [Arch](arch.md) it's done with `pacman`.
- [green](greenwashing.md) [capitalism](capitalism.md) :'D my sides
@ -40,13 +43,19 @@ Also remember the worst thing you can do to a joke is put a [disclaimer](disclai
- What is a [computer](computer.md)? A device that can make a hundred million mistakes per second.
- After all it may not take so long to establish our [utopia](less_retarded_society.md). By the time [Windows](windows.md) has updated we will have already done it ten times over.
- Cool statistics: 9 out of 10 people enjoy a gang [rape](rape.md).
- Basement hackers never die, they just smell that way. Musicians never die, they just decompose (and musicians working part time are [semiconductors](semicoductor.md)).
- `int randomInt(void) { int x; return x; }`
- Boss: "We're going to need to store additional information about gender of all 1600 people in our database." Me: "OK that's only 200 extra bytes.". Diversity department: "You're fired."
- the [downto](downto.md) operator
- [Schizophrenia](schizo.md) beats being alone.
- I just had sex with a German chick, for some reason she kept yelling her age. (Or maybe she just didn't consent.)
- I find it much more pleasant to browse the web on a 1 bit display, it can't display a [rainbow](lgbt.md).
- Why are [noobs](noob.md) the most pacifist beings in existence? Because they never beat anyone.
- You scratch my [tape](tape.md), I scratch yours.
- There's a new version of Debian Bull's Eye that's compiled exclusively with [Rust](rust.md). Its code name is [Bull's Shit](bullshit.md).
- [Manager](manager.md) is that who thinks 9 women can produce a child in 1 month.
- Have you heard the [atheists](atheism.md) are starting their own non-prophet?
- Those who can, do. Those who cannot, teach. Those who cannot teach, [do business](entrepreneur.md).
- An [Apple](apple.md) a day keeps [sanity](lrs.md) away.
*"I invented the term 'object oriented' and [C++](cpp.md) was not what I had in mind"* --[Alan Kay](alan_kay.md), inventor of OOP
Object-oriented programming (OOP, also object-obsessed programming and objectfuscated programming) is a [programming paradigm](paradigm.md) that tries to model reality as a collection of abstract objects that communicate with each other and obey some specific rules. While the idea itself isn't bad and can be useful in certain cases, **OOP has become extremely overused, extremely badly implemented and downright forced in programming languages** which apply this [abstraction](abstraction.md) to every single program and concept, creating [anti-patterns](anti_pattern.md), unnecessary issues and of course [bloat](bloat.md). We therefore see OOP as a **[cancer](cancer.md) of software development**. Many others oppose it, e.g. [Bitreich](bitreich.md) voice criticism in their manifesto, saying we rather need a *subject oriented programming*; the idea of OOP being real bad is leaking even into the mainstream so it's becoming less and less controversial to shit on it.
Object-oriented programming (OOP, also object-obsessed programming, objectfuscated programming or artificial inelegance) is a [programming paradigm](paradigm.md) that tries to model reality as a collection of abstract objects that communicate with each other and obey some specific rules. While the idea itself isn't bad and can be useful in certain cases, **OOP has become extremely overused, extremely badly implemented and downright forced in programming languages** which apply this [abstraction](abstraction.md) to every single program and concept, creating [anti-patterns](anti_pattern.md), unnecessary issues and of course [bloat](bloat.md). We therefore see OOP as a **[cancer](cancer.md) of software development**. Many others oppose it, e.g. [Bitreich](bitreich.md) voice criticism in their manifesto, saying we rather need a *subject oriented programming*; the idea of OOP being real bad is leaking even into the mainstream so it's becoming less and less controversial to shit on it.
Ugly examples of OOP gone bad include [Java](java.md) and [C++](cpp.md) (which at least doesn't force it). Other languages such as [Python](python.md) and [Javascript](javascript.md) include OOP but have lightened it up a bit and at least allow you to avoid using it.
